Tweet
My letter to Santa & my philosophy of life. :D
My letter to Santa & My Philosophy of Life
I was lying around, pondering the
problems of the world, I realized
that at my age I don't really give a
darn anymore. If walking is good for
your health, the postman would be
immortal.
A whale swims all day, only eats
fish, drinks water, but is still fat.
A rabbit runs and hops and only
lives 15 years, while a tortoise
doesn't run and does mostly nothing,
yet it lives for 150 years.
And you tell me to exercise?? I
don't think so.
Just grant me the senility to forget
the people I never liked, The good
fortune to remember the ones I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm older here's what I've
discovered:
1. I started out with nothing, and I
still have most of it.
2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed
with prunes and all-bran.
3. I finally got my head together,
and now my body is falling apart.
4. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
5. If all is not lost, then where
the heck is it
6. It was a whole lot easier to get
older, than to get wiser.
7. Some days, you're the top dog,
some days you're the hydrant.
8. I wish the buck really did stop
here, I sure could use more of them.
9. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
10. Kids in the back seat cause
accidents.
11. Accidents in the back seat cause
kids.
12. It's hard to make a comeback
when you haven't been anywhere.
13. The world only beats a path to
your door when you're in the bathroom.
14. If God wanted me to touch my
toes, he'd have put them on my knees.
15. When I'm finally holding all the
right cards, everyone wants to play
chess.
16. It's not hard to meet expenses .
. . they're everywhere.
17. The only difference between a
rut and a grave is the depth.
18. These days, I spend a lot of
time thinking about the hereafter .
. . I go somewhere to get something,
and then wonder what I'm "here after".
19. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
HAVE I SENT THIS MESSAGE TO YOU BEFORE?
Or did I get it from you?
Have a GOOD CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEARS!
I wanted to be the first one to wish you the seasons greetings.
I was lying around, pondering the
problems of the world, I realized
that at my age I don't really give a
darn anymore. If walking is good for
your health, the postman would be
immortal.
A whale swims all day, only eats
fish, drinks water, but is still fat.
A rabbit runs and hops and only
lives 15 years, while a tortoise
doesn't run and does mostly nothing,
yet it lives for 150 years.
And you tell me to exercise?? I
don't think so.
Just grant me the senility to forget
the people I never liked, The good
fortune to remember the ones I do,
and the eyesight to tell the difference.
Now that I'm older here's what I've
discovered:
1. I started out with nothing, and I
still have most of it.
2. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed
with prunes and all-bran.
3. I finally got my head together,
and now my body is falling apart.
4. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
5. If all is not lost, then where
the heck is it
6. It was a whole lot easier to get
older, than to get wiser.
7. Some days, you're the top dog,
some days you're the hydrant.
8. I wish the buck really did stop
here, I sure could use more of them.
9. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
10. Kids in the back seat cause
accidents.
11. Accidents in the back seat cause
kids.
12. It's hard to make a comeback
when you haven't been anywhere.
13. The world only beats a path to
your door when you're in the bathroom.
14. If God wanted me to touch my
toes, he'd have put them on my knees.
15. When I'm finally holding all the
right cards, everyone wants to play
chess.
16. It's not hard to meet expenses .
. . they're everywhere.
17. The only difference between a
rut and a grave is the depth.
18. These days, I spend a lot of
time thinking about the hereafter .
. . I go somewhere to get something,
and then wonder what I'm "here after".
19. Funny, I don't remember being
absent-minded.
HAVE I SENT THIS MESSAGE TO YOU BEFORE?
Or did I get it from you?
Have a GOOD CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEARS!
I wanted to be the first one to wish you the seasons greetings.
