Dear hubby, I'm writing this letter to tell u that I'm leaving u for good.. I've been a good wife to u for 7yrs & I have nothing to show for it. The last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me u quit ur job 2day & that was the last straw. Last week, u came home n didn't even notice I had a new haircut, cooked ur favorite meal n even wore a new silk dress. U ate in 2 mins, n went straight to sleep after watching all of ur games. U don't tell me u love me anymore; u don't want anything that connects us as husband n wife. Either u r cheating on me or u don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone. Don't try to find me. Ur BROTHER n I r moving away to Paris together! Have a great life!X_X=D Dear Ex-Wife, Nothing has made my day more than receiving ur letter. It's true u n I have been married for 7yrs, although a good wife is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my games so much cause they drown out ur constant nagging. I Did notice when u got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'U look just like a boy!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if u can't say something nice, I didn't comment. N when u cooked my favorite meal, u must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork yrs ago. About that new silk dress: I turned away from u because the $49 price tag was still on them, n I prayed it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved u n felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job n bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home u were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I hope u have the fulfilling life u always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter u wrote ensures u won't get a dime from me. So take care. Signed,Ur Ex-Husband, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S: I don't know if I ever told u this, but my brother Carl was born as Carla. Goodbye!..
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