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Sunday morning...Dec. 3rd

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  • Sunday morning...Dec. 3rd

    Good morning.

    Didn't think I was going to get out of the bed this morning. Went to the Lake yesterday, and raked & burned leaves for about 3 hours. Even got a blister on my left thumb because I didn't take any gloves with me.


    The following is long, but worth the read.

    In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says,"The Lord thy God is one," but I think He must be a lot older than that.
    Anyway, God said, "Give me a light!" and someone did. Then God made the world.
    He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.

    Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden ... Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.
    Adam and Eve had a son,Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel. Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.
    One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

    After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

    Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.
    God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff.
    Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.
    One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.
    After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

    After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

    There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.
    After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New Testa-ment. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, "Close the door! Were you born in a barn?" It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')
    During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Republicans. Jesus also had twelve opossums.The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

    Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount. But the Democrats and all those other bad guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

    Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

    (Told by a 6 year old)
    Last edited by jostoy; 12-03-2017, 08:00 AM.
    Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured.

  • #2
    Morning..sorry for staying away. Not been feeling great..my a1c is mot controlled well. I am going back to doctor tomarrow. I had a temporary crown and fake tooth put in this week. My crowned tooth still hurts.

    Today is Bible study..tommarow begins another busy week.
    Last edited by bethina; 12-03-2017, 09:06 AM.

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    • #3
      Good Mornng ,

      still giggling Jostoy... read that off to David. laughing.. I taught 5-6 yr old in Sunday school. and had many laughs. but that is a goodie!.. again , you are overworking ..slow down Jo

      Bethina sure hope you get to feeling better. are you working too?

      headed out for church in a bit..
      Spent hours yesterday crocheting on G-Grandson little afg.. If my hands stay limber, I want to start a random afg. for Donna's Blaise.. while I have all the yarns setting out.. my books and reading is the loser.. but I will catch up on those later.. I have to get my head thinking of Christmas things I have to shop for.. today , will lay aside crochet long enough this afternoon to get the cards ready to mail.

      How is everyone this morning .. Elaine, think of you guys a lots
      Paula, so busy!. Maxie , busy too . and not feeling well?.
      Hope we hear from SassyGirl soon
      Sharon,,, ( nag) slow down!!!!! same advice to Donna
      Jo G.. send me some warm air and sunshine please... if you have any to spare.. I hate winter.
      Hi Darla.
      Hey there Lisa.Hows Tex doing ?.
      If I missed your name, ( hello Niece).. consider yourself hugged anyway!!!

      Will send a wave to Kim, Nalani, Deb, Judy.

      see you all later..

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      • #4
        Good morning.
        Jostoy, thanks for making my day with that story. I really laughed. You get a Blue Ribbon on that one!

        Well, Iím finally feeling better today. More like myself. Iím finally catching up on my sleep.
        I did get the laundry done yesterday. Yay!
        Today E wants to go see a couple of movies. He said the cinema has reclining seats. So if I donít care for the movies he has picked, I can nap through them. 😉

        So thatís about as exciting as things will get today.
        Beth, hope you feel better.
        Everyone, have a great day! ☀️
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
        Create a beautiful day wherever you go.

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        • #5
          Good Morning.

          Rushing thru. Made an apple pie and a casserole for church. Expecting a ton a guests.

          Tour of homes this afternoon.

          Have a super Sunday, Everyone.

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          • #6
            Yes maye I am working...its been busy..and stressful

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            • #7
              Maye, we are actually getting sunshine today. Iíll be glad to let you have some of this warm air...today is in the upper 70ís, tomorrow the low 70ís, then itíll be bouncing between the high 60ís and low 70ís for a while.
              Hope it gets there to give you some reprieve from your colder temps.
              ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
              Create a beautiful day wherever you go.

              Comment


              • #8
                Good Morning! It's another sunny one. I think we've had a week of sunny days.....so blessed!!!

                Guess what I've been doing? Baking & baking some more. I'm just about sick & tired of it. Well, yesterday I really didn't bake. I packaged up cookies first thing yesterday until Cork got home, then I went into town to Aldi's and the hospital. My SIL had a mini-stroke on Friday while at the urgent care for her sinus infection. God was good to have her there rather than driving when it happened. There was no lasting effects from it, but she now has to take BP meds, which she isn't happy about.

                I spent the evening mixing up icings and a couple more cookie doughs. I had to make 6 batches of the gobb dough.

                Oh....early Saturday morning Blaise woke me up when he started throwing up. He was up twice through the night. Fever, throwing up, & sore throat. He even took a couple naps yesterday and didn't fight me going to bed last night....he was sick.

                This morning I stayed home from church with him, and started baking the gobbs. I think I'll be making those until tomorrow morning. I need 20 doz, so that means I'll be baking at least 40 doz since they are a sandwich type of cookies. At least I have the filling made up for them.

                Have a good one all! Think I'm going to go take a power nap before I continue on.

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                • #9
                  Morning...found all the coffee cups. They are sitting on the floor beside my chair. Now would I be on a rant if anyone else did that! so I will quickly and quietly get them into the dishwasher. The window candles came yesterday so will get them into the windows today. AND that is the end of my decorating. Next up wrapping..

                  Yesterday we went to the visitation of the two girls killed in the Thanksgiving week accident. It ran from 10:00 to 6:00 and we waited in line for a long time. We knew this family...those girls were in and out of my house and came with their lunches every day. I drove them to movies and malls; took prom pictures and sat with their parents and grandparents at sporting and school events. When you hug the mother and grandmother and listen to them you know it will be a very long time before anything will ever resemble normal for that family. Last night the arrangements for the final girl were announced and we have to this again next Saturday.

                  I have laundry today because Sierra has no work clothes and is suddenly picking up more hours. I think she upped her availability. Her bills are higher than her income and that is her fault. She needs to be more responsible and realize that her income should be more than her bills. I guess they learn eventually. I guess we all had to learn that at some time.

                  Tuesday morning bright and predawn early I am having a parathyroid removed. They scan and do whatever and know which one it is and should be in and out and home by noon. Then I want to move my appointment with the derma up and have this other spot on my nose looked at. I know it is a precancer since he took one off last visit in close to the same spot. And then for later in the winter I will get my knee looked at. The one that gave a couple of weeks ago is bothering me and sometimes very painful. I just do not have the time to be getting old. Tuesday I will be 70. How in the hell did that happen? I mean really? Shouldn't my mind have a clue that it was coming? Now I will be elderly and my brain is saying that is unacceptable. Only the old body is saying 'yep, it's true..you are a geezer'. How rude!!

                  Things to do and the only question is how much of it will I actually get busy and do. It is like a game on how much work I can carry from Monday to Friday. I swear these 24 hour Hallmark movies on two separate channels is killing me with trying to keep up!

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                  • Paula A
                    Paula A commented
                    Editing a comment
                    Oh, maxie! I remember your posts about Sierra and her friends coming home for lunch. I didn't think I could feel sadder about this but reading this today just made me feel a bit closer to the pain you all are feeling.

                • #10
                  As a ps...a couple of weeks ago Paula told me where to go for the rounders face book page. I went and thought I had connected but now cannot even find the darn page. It is no secret I am the dumbest of dumb computer people so can you tell me how get there and to please accept me if I ever stumble upon the place.

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                  • Paula A
                    Paula A commented
                    Editing a comment
                    bout that age thing: we are not getting OLD we are Redefining the numbers!

                    You do way too much and your wit is way to quick to be in the geezer category!

                • #11
                  Good Morning and a busy one it has been, way to much to go into right now, but wanted to say good morning will come back later to read and catch up with everyone...hugs to all..
                  Live simply, love generously, care deeply, speak kindly, and leave the rest to God

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                  • #12
                    Good Sunny Sunday! I had to put my sunglasses in my bag and that is a good thing!

                    I need to get moving. I got up earlier but I am like the tortoise and the hare: I think I have all the time I need and then, Bam! It is time to get out the door and I am looking for my shoes. right now I am wearing slipers but I do know which shoes I am wearing, which is half the issue and I know exactly where they aer and that is the other half of the issue.

                    I had to run off the words to amazing Grace so I could have them for the Celebration of Life. It will not be at a church and there won't be a piano... And I am not going to sing all the verses so I want to go over it while I am at church to see which ones I want to sing.

                    And I forgot I am reading a part of a Christmas lesson today and had to copy that off so I would have bigger print and mark where we are singing...it is for our women's meeting time . This is when everything gets busy..

                    I will be back later, but I also l want to say even with all the Busy-ness of this time of year, I cherish you all as some of my true gifts!

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                    • #13
                      Maxi, you are not the dumbest person.....I believe I have that spot when it comes to Facebook. I cannot navigate that site. IF Iíd I signed in there, I donít remember my info. The only way Iíve gotten in from day 1, is if someone else posts, and I get an email that takes me to the Facebook page.
                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                      Create a beautiful day wherever you go.

                      Comment


                      • #14
                        Good Afternoon same old same old here.

                        Jostoy, your story reminded me of something between my Aunt and I. She was my Sunday School teacher when I was little. Anyhow when she told us about the walls coming down our activity was to make drums and march around the church. I was so convinced it would fall down I asked God not to let it, after all my Grandparents were in there. Years later when I told her it was my fault she started explaining that God told them to make the walls fall back then, and since he wasn't telling them to make the church fall, they were just pretending.

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